1- Sleep- Some may say you sleep when you are dead, well, if you don’t get enough sleep you will end up dead sooner. Those that seem to get by on less sleep are more likely enjoying high quality sleep in the short amount of time sleeping vs. the person who is tossing and turning over 8 hours. Sleep is fundamental to the functioning of our brains and bodies. It helps us regulate our emotions and maintain our mental health. Every notice how after a few nights of bad sleep suddenly everything starts to seem frustrating… how your kids crying was fine before, but now you just want a damn break. How your partners face was handsome, but now them breathing next to you is just annoying. You start feeling hostile and more combative. It is no different than your child acting out when they haven’t gotten enough sleep; adults think our needs are so different, but you can’t change the basics of our biology.
SIeep helps us regulate our emotional fortitude, which is vital when facing daily life challenges and meeting long term goals. Lack of sleep leads to an inability to focus, lack of creativity, lack of energy, lack of motivation, mood swings, increased risk of getting sick due to poor immunity, higher stress, accelerated aging and more. Your sleep matters.
2- Daily Movement- Humans were not meant to be sitting and stuck behind screens like key clicking robots. Our bodies were built to roam and move daily. We were meant to be outdoors in nature daily. No office or stairmaster can replace that need. Every question why when in school time is made for exercise and play, but suddenly after college you are supposed to be desk sitting robot….Taking a simple 20-minute walk can help reduce stress, clear your mind, settle your emotions, create room for meditation, creative thinking, problem solving, relaxation and energy boosting. Exercise releases the much-needed serotonin, endorphins, and dopamine hormones that help maintain a healthy mind and body.
3- Healthy Diet and Plenty of Water- Notice how you feel when you eat processed, sugary, low protein foods vs. vegetable, fruit, whole grain, healthy fat, organic, protein meals. Notice how you feel when you drink 8 cups of water vs. day of soda, juice, coffee or next to nothing. If can say with 100% confidence that when I don’t make enough effort to drink sufficient water my energy plummets. I feel like garbage and don’t have the energy to get things done. When I don’t get things done, my anxiety and stress skyrocket as I continue to further behind. I get mad I am not making progress towards my goals. I feel frustrated that I feel like crap. I feel stressed I didn’t have energy to exercise.
Once you have your basic health in order that helps you regulate your emotions and energy, then you will have the mental, physical and emotional strength to focus on the rest of your life and maintain a more peaceful and productive mindset
4- Mindset Mantra– Wake up every day and say or write 3 things you are thankful for, 3 things that are good about yourself and 3 affirmations. It helps set the tone for your mind and day. Gratitude can be hard when life is hard, but there are always things to be grateful for. Life can get you down and the negative thinking cycle can lead to starting your days with list of worries, instead of a list of reasons to be hopeful. The negativity of the world, abusive family, toxic media, abusive partner, lack of support system and a lifetime of problems can wear down your confidence and strength. It is vital you train your brain, just like you would a muscle, to focus on good things about yourself and your life.
5- Focus- What are you focusing on every day? Is your evil ex popping into your mind bringing stress, anxiety and anger? Are you thinking about your ahole boss or coworker during dinner vs paying attention to your partner or kids? Are you stewing in anger ruining what should be fun weekends because of something that is out of your control?
When your mind starts drifting towards all the bad things from your past, your regrets, your pain and problems, or towards worries regarding your future, you must put a stop button on your thinking. Write down your list of worries, talk to a friend or limit your rumination to an hour, but you must actively stop your brain from living too much in the past or future or the joys of the present moment will pass by unnoticed. Adults can take a page from the book of kids and animals; they have this beautiful way of feeling joy by living in the moment. We can learn from their thinking.
6 Progress Towards Your Goals– Set up daily micro goals towards your personal life, career, family, fitness or whatever is most important to you. Setting achievable goals vs. an all or nothing approach will help bring peace to your life and confidence within yourself.
7 Feeling Respected, Seen, Understood, Valued- Most of us don’t realize how much we need to feel respected and understood until we don’t have it in our work life and/or home life. When you are in a place where you can be yourself without being judged, shamed, mocked, talked down to, you begin to feel safe and comfortable. When you feel valued, you feel like you belong, and you feel loved. When you are in a place where you feel like garbage every day, are disrespected and always on guard, you will find it difficult to feel happy.
8 Purpose- Doing something that you are good at and enjoy doing. This is where you feel inspired and empowered. This is something that you are interested in and want to talk about or do. There are many who make impressive incomes at jobs they despise because they it lacks purpose and meaning. There are many who are in relationships for show because they lack connection. You must feel connected to what you are doing and who you are with.
9 Something to Look Forward to– Having something to look forward to could be as simple as lunch with a friend, or as grand as a getaway vacation. There are lots of people who love to be alone, therefore social events are not something that will bring them happiness. For others, it is important to have social events in order to feel happy, and they absolutely must ensure they keep up a strong social life. While I believe in love, I believe you can be happy without a partner as sometimes your person is longer on this earth, or you don’t come across someone that makes you want to join forces with. That is okay- you can find love in friends, animals, or family. There are also lots of people that have material wealth seemingly living a dream life, but still feel unhappy. We know acquiring objects and financial goals may not be enough. You must have something that brings you joy, and that you look forward to doing in life beyond the material.
10 Helping Others- I truly believe that our purpose is to give back and help others as much as we can. We can help by being a good friend, partner, family member or parent. We can help by volunteering our time and resources. We can help by being a supportive listening ear to others. We can help by teaching what we know. There are many ways to help the world, but without giving back, no amount of material objects will fill the void.